Recently I have met with several students who are very anxious about school. Anxiety can come to these kiddos for a variety of reasons. Today’s tip will focus on some of the reasons why children feel anxiety.
1. A lack of understanding: Students can feel anxious because their learning style isn’t being met. (visit www.excelachievement.com/process) The way that the teacher or their parents explain material to them isn’t the way that they learn best. In their earlier years of schooling, these children probably tried to communicate this, but unfortunately were unsuccessful. This is when anxiety and frustration sets in.
2. A lack of feeling heard: Anxiety can come when a child is trying to express his or her thoughts and feelings, but then does not feel heard. They are instead told how the teacher and/or parents do things and think about things, and how they should do it the same way. Anxiety comes here because they feel that they are different and maybe even “lesser than” than those around them.
3. Lack of safety: Students feel anxious when they do not feel safe and secure. This can happen if they do not feel heard and understood. They begin to shut down and quit sharing their thoughts and feelings.
Some warning signs that your child may be feeling anxious are:
1. Falling grades
2. Lack of turning in assignments
3. Is moody and doesn’t seem in control of his/her emotions
Our children deserve to feel safe and heard. It is my personal belief that the role models in their life really need to take the time to really hear the children in their lives. Here are some tips:
1. Celebrate your child’s differences. Each child is created to complete his/her purpose on this planet. It is our job as parents to nurture our child into their true purpose and not just get them to conform to ours.
2. Find out your child’s learning style and help them to utilize this to maximize his/her potential.
3. In the words of Stephen Covey, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” Really let your child know that you value their thoughts and feelings. Besides, open-mindedness is a great characteristic to model for your child!
Children have been some of my greatest teachers. After all, “It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” ~Frederick Douglass
